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Tuesday, February 7, 2023

Hello Kitty is not a cat but human and has a boyfriend

In the sketch, Hello Kitty store managers try to onboard new workers and inform them that Hello Kitty is a little girl.— Video screengrabs via NBC

People are only now becoming aware that Hello Kitty is not a cat. Social media users are still having trouble comprehending what the legendary figure actually was, which was revealed in an SNL sketch that aired this past weekend.

In the sketch, Hello Kitty store managers try to onboard new workers by giving them some background information about the Sanrio mascot.

One of the managers said, “If you open to page five of your employee handbooks, you’ll notice a list of facts about Hello Kitty.”

“As you can see, she loves to bake cookies, she goes to school, and she’s not a cat, she’s a human little girl,” the manager said.

“No… why did you say Hello Kitty was a human little girl,” one of the employees-in-training said in shock.

As per a The Sun report, Christine R. Yano, an anthropologist from the University of Hawaii, received a rude awakening from Sanrio, the corporation that created Hello Kitty, as she was getting ready for her show at the Japanese American National Museum.

Christine had a very strong conviction that Hello Kitty was a cat, but Sanrio sternly corrected her.

The Los Angeles Times quoted her as saying, “That’s one correction Sanrio made for my script for the show.”

“Hello Kitty is not a cat. She’s a cartoon character. She is a little girl. She is a friend. But she is not a cat. She’s never depicted on all fours.”

She moves on two legs, sitting and walking. She does, however, have a pet cat that goes by the name of Charmmy Kitty.

Further investigation reveals that Hello Kitty is not Japanese, unlike what many people think. She is actually British, a third-grader who was born in 1974, and at 48 years old, she is most likely the oldest third-grader ever.

Her zodiac sign is Scorpio. She is the daughter of George and Mary White, and her full name is Kitty White.

She is a human child who dresses up as a cat, owns a pet cat, and even has a boyfriend named Dear Daniel who is an actual cat, which makes her situation even stranger.

The revelation caused shock, astonishment, and outright denial among the netizens.

“hello kitty lore is actually insane like what do you mean she’s a human girl who’s British but also only weighs as much as 5 apples?? and she has a boyfriend?” a user wrote.

“There goes my childhood. What’s next? Mickey Mouse isn’t a Mouse either?” asked one netizen.

“It will take me decades to wrap my head around this,” Buzzfeed wrote.

“Finallllly we’re talking about the incredible creepiness of hello kitty (whom I do love) being a human,” said another user.

“Veterinarians hate her for this one simple trick,” joked another.

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